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MORE LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT |
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Written by To The Point News
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Friday, 16 July 2010 |
By popular demand, more examples of The Highest Level of
Language Development. Don't beg for
mercy.
A will is a dead giveaway.
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies
like a banana.
A backward poet writes inverse.
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
You're stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
A calendar's days are numbered.
A boiled egg is hard to beat.
He had a photographic memory but it was never developed.
Hear about the short fortuneteller who escaped from prison? He's a small medium at large.
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He
acquired his size from too much pi.
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be
an optical Aleutian.
She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a
weapon of math disruption.
No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
Don't join dangerous cults: practice safe sects.
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your
mother.
When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.
An anthropologist studying a primitive tribe in the jungle develops
constipation. He asks the tribe's shaman
for help. The shaman gives him the
leaves of a particular fern tree that grows in the jungle. "Are you sure these will work?" the
anthropologist wonders as he starts chewing the fern leaves. The shaman replies they will work very well,
because, he says, "With fronds like these, who needs enemas?"
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